I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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