Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize