rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
