yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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