You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
you never un-have a 4some
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
