Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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