I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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