i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
