two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
