yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
