Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
