I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
You work out of a Hotel?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
