remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize