physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
