He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Randomize