my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize