the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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