You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
