Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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