Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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