This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
