their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
