is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Dicks are not precious.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize