I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Randomize
