What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
