I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
