yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
