she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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