Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
