Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
