walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
So squirting runs in the family.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
