So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
operation harelip BJ is a go
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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