no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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