She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
