he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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