I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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