There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
