I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
God, I missed his penis.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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