He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize