SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
