paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
