i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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