did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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