So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize