I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
