I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
