He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
