Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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