this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
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