I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
